Click below to listen to People Get Ready by Eva Cassidy:
I’ve been writing about changes, but I’ve not shared what type of changes are occurring. That’s because when you are in the “funnel cloud” all you can do is feel – as one’s vision is blurred with all the spinning.
I’ve learned to not get caught in the spin cycles the way I used too. Actually, I think it’s really practice that keeps me focused on my goals. When I was younger things would get crazy with change and I’d drop out for a few days.
Now I just lay a line to where I’m going or what I want in my life and hold tight.
Being married to Lee is like living in one big old cloud of circular energy, if you know him than you understand that he ALWAYS has a TON of stuff going on and that he LOVES change, he’s also not one to sit still for very long. I love this side of him, but it makes for windy and sometimes unpredictable sailing. Currently he has so many projects going that if I tap into his dreaming or direction of things, I can lose my own personal life’s vision. It’s taken a few years, however I’ve really mastered navigating where I place my attention, lending me to understand what I have control of and what I don’t. Spinning in circles is pointless and leaks big energy regardless, however when one spins in another beings rinse cycle – the leak can turn into a giant hole!
Years back – I’m talking 12 – a friend of mine went to visit a psychic, this friend of mine took with them a photo of me and handed it to the psychic. The psychic then told them that I was going to be a well-known writer. At the time of this reading I didn’t believe this woman because the only thing I’d ever written was inside my private and personal journal – rants and raves about life.
Close to 4 years ago, another friend of mine went to see this same person, she called me and shared her experience – encouraging me to give this gal a shout out and have a reading. I took the number but felt no reason to call – I was situated in my life in Malibu pregnant with Lola and happy. A few months after Lola was born, I decided to give this “Future Reading Gal” a ring – who KNOWS what she’d tell me.
For the record – I did not tell her about my friend and the photo from years back and I didn’t tell her that I’d actually become a writer. In fact I told her very little, again “Hi I Got One Eye On You” views everyone with skepticism – especially a psychic!
Right away I liked this gal’s Ohio accent and down home feel. She jumped in, telling me I was about to move. Of course I argued with her, telling her NO WAY, I LOVED my life and this was not in the plans. She said “You Are Moving To PARADISE”. Again with argument “No, I think you are reading where I currently live – Malibu – I have a view of the ocean and a palm tree in my yard.” She continued…”No doll – you are going to live in the real paradise.” Ignoring me, she continued to tell me about my writing and what was coming. I giggled, as I was nursing an infant and driving a toddler to and fro- the only thing I was writing were checks once a month to pay the bills. In fact, the reason I had reached out for a reading was that I’d been going through a phase – wondering if who I had been before Lee and children, was still somewhere deep in there or had she been pushed out along with the placenta?
Guess what?
Within that year we moved to PARADISE – Sayulita, Mexico, where I took an office outside of the house and went back to work – as a writer!
Last Friday my same friend had a chat with this “Future Reading Gal” and called me. “Mee I spoke to the psychic today and she needs to talk to you. What time can she call you.” Again I was like, no that’s cool I don’t want a reading – my friend was like “No she wants to tell you somethings she is not going to charge you, it’s important.”
So we spoke that night, guess what she said?
I’m moving!
I told her NO she is reading what I just did a month ago,and that I’ve just submitted the girls contracts for next years school year. She told me yeah that’s nice but you will move again- WEST to where there is wind and water. She said that Bella doesn’t want to return to her current school. I argued, “I can’t keep moving these kids, I can’t keep this gypsy pace up.” Her response was simple “Your kids picked you on a soul level, they are children of the world – this is a gift.” Hmmmmm…..
She said I’m going for work, that there is a deal brewing and I’ve to got stand on my own feet, that it’s time. She then told me that a gal I just met in Mexico City this past trip is divine intervention – we’ve got a business deal to do. Funny thing is, I did meet with someone work related and I knew they were a fit because the second I entered their offices I felt a brush of exciting energy blow through me. The last tip to reveal is she said I’ve got to work my butt off for the next 6 months – putting the plan together.
The rest of the reading I will keep secret , ’cause I don’t want to jinks it!
When we arrived last year I shared that we were here for only 18 months, but there was a definite part of me that was hoping that Nashville could become home. It would be the best if this were to be true, after all we have a large ranch here and business. I thought, if just maybe I could find a groove, we could finally rest our gypsy feet; I must mention that Nashville IS a lovely city with tons to offer.
Meeting Marielle and her girls have been a very positive influence on our life here. Marielle is from the “A Tulips Tears” post….When she came to my house a year ago it was like I knew I could breath, her girls were a fit with mine and she and I instantly understood each other. Marielle has lived all over the world and traveled a great deal. She is Belgium and born in Mexico City, her family speaks French, English and Spanish. Instantly Bella and her oldest daughter latched on to eachother, relating to one another’s large worldly views – they also shared the same family conversations “where will we go next? How long are we here for?”
In fact this is how many of Marielle’s and my conversations began, we’d sit at her breakfast nook table, surrounded by red walls and giant windows – I’d stare out the window talking about life out there (Nashville has really been a place we feel is lived inside – as no one walks or physically connects on the street often) and how we wondered who it is we were actually becoming. You see Nashville has been, for the both of us, a place to rest, reflect and grow. It is not our community, so socializing isn’t part of our deal here. Here is about family, husbands and for me work and healing my body. Both of us have found inspiration in each other as we have discussed how we see our lives progressing on all levels. Our conversations are not shallow and for me they have been wonderful little moments of connection, something I crave and feast upon.
I’m really quite cat-like in how I live life, I don’t need constant attention and once I connect with someone I am easily satisfied – fulfilled with knowing I have my “people”. So NO, Nashville is not my heart’s desire but I’ve built a world here, my work is cranking, my health is better than it’s EVER been, I love my new house and I’ve got a couple folks to share thoughts with, plus the girls now have Marielle’s girls. I’ve made a point to car pool with them and keep a consistent weekly play date. Bella is like me – it just takes one person -in this same way, she and Ines have formed a close friendship and she is totally fulfilled.
Last night Marielle announced to me that they are returning to Mexico City the first of June…
I am sad.
I feel for Bella, as I remember my friend Heather Kelly moving away to Oregon when I was 8 years old. My mother was supposed to load up the U Haul and move with them as Heathers momma was a single parent heading west to start over. The day the truck came for their belongings, I cried into my pillow, for two reasons…one that I wanted us to start over and two that my close friend was leaving. For certain this is where my “Hi I’m Fine With Out You” grabbed a hold! Of course, the list of places that she gained leverage in my personality is giant, but this moment was the first time that my heart broke and I understood why.
Ines is Bella’s friend at school, they have become each others “people.” The problem with her school is that it’s tiny, all of the other kids have their person and hers is leaving. She’d mentioned before that she wanted to change schools, I ignored it, thinking maybe it was just middle of the year blues, then this week, she stated her case with the clarity and specifics of an adult! I heard her…then she talked to her teacher – I thought this would convince her to stay – instead she asked me to not talk to her teacher until we visited other schools. Hmmm..OK.
Then last night, after discussing that Ines is leaving, she again asked to pursue another avenue. Once again Princess Know It All doesn’t KNOW what to do…do I remove her from the school and then remove her again if we move in a year? Do I hear her, and listen to her as she asked for more structure in her classroom – she is in a Montessori elementary school so it’s a lot of independent learning.
I think I’ve just landed along my first cliff…..will I jump?
What I realized yesterday as Marielle and I sat looking out the window once again, like we always do, is that time is moving and if I’m not mindful I will miss the moment. Marielle and I have shared wonderful conversations, about parenting, life, and living in a world that is not ours. She says that it’s like Nashville is a stop along a train track, one where you get off and rest – protected in comfy homes with rolling lawns. I stared out her wonderful window seeing that soon I be on the other side, looking back into a room where I once sat.
Again I am moved to emotion as I am reminded of something I KNOW: It’s always unclear who will have great influence upon me and the amount of time of the encounter is irrelevant.
Marielle showed up in my life at a time where all I needed were tiny talks and a simple friend.
I awoke in the middle of the night feeling like that 8 year old child once again, watching yet another friend load a U Haul and re-board her train. Destiny is a wonderful gift, Marielle and her husbands original assignment was Los Angeles and then his company’s headquarters moved to Nashville. We were meant to connect and influence one another. As much as my “HI PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME CONNECT” wants to pop up to protect me from change, I can’t allow her.
This morning I contacted a small catholic school next to the Convent and 2 blocks from my house, I will visit them next week and maybe my new beginning is here or just maybe the psychic gal is right and we too will head west to WATER AND WIND, is this Mexico or Malibu, I don’t know – but she did say “RETURN”.
I guess, I won’t KNOW until this funnel cloud stops spinning.
