The other day I drove by our old house, the one with “Whispering Walls”.  It’d been sometime since I’d passed, not because I consciously was trying to avoid it but because my daily driving route has changed.

Ever since passing by my mind has been hooked by memories of what we experienced there, I know I left you all hanging but it was for good reason – once we knew what we knew it was all I could do to pack as fast as humanly possible and get out.  I’ve not spoken in detail about what went down, not because the landlord asked me not too, which she did and I respecting her didn’t want to hinder the future sale of her home, however I did inform her that in good faith she must tell future renters  -  had I known I’d never have moved in there – but of course it was all perfect, had we not moved in there our presence couldn’t have shifted a very old situation the way that it did….I’m getting ahead of myself, sorry.

My real reason for not writing was because the darkness that did what it did in that house was so big I fo’sho didn’t want it following me via my memories to our new house; my Poppy (my grandfather) always said “Decide where you stand the light or dark, once you make that decision stick with it.”  So at a young age I KNEW I was fixn’ to walk in the light – avoiding as best as possible any interaction with darkness.

I have NEVER been a fan of horror movies, scary books and to tell the truth Halloween and it’s “Evil” characters kind of creep me out. Dressing up in funny things are cool with Mee & of course vampires as I am obsessed with the idea of immortality; the thought of what it would be like to really get good at this human reaction thing is intriguing.

The Day of the Dead, is one of my favorite holidays – because it’s not about sadness but again celebrating the connection as we pass through the veils of this world – death is not evil its an intricate part of life.  With all this said and my deepening comprehension of memories, time & ghosts – that our memories actually are what haunts our hallways and dreams – what went down in our last Casa is revealing it’s self with a new perspective.

Tonight I spoke to a friend on the phone that I’d not caught up with since before Thanksgiving, and well it was the day after the Thanksgiving weekend that everything began to unravel and the truth would not remain hidden – the clanging of cupboards and doors was no longer something we could ignore.

As I began to tell her, why we’d moved so suddenly; the room got cold and felt as if it were crowding in on me.  Before I could even finish the first sentence my friend suddenly said you know what let’s not talk about this, my body is covered in chills. I said thanks, we can talk about it later when I see you in California.

After we hung up, I sat alone in my room and yet that crowded feeling filled the space – I thought of Senora Gina and how she nips situations, folks & thoughts in the butt -”Oh, No We Aren’t Going There”  came out of my mouth, with the same I’m not playing around tone as Senora used when with me when the possibility of Cancer knocked on my door.

Just like a bully on a playground pulls back from someone who stands up to them – refusing to feed their poison -  I did not participate – this is how one stays in the light; and so the energy in my room shifted.

What left remaining was her, I thought of her all night….the one who’s story I have tried to leave behind.  Not such an easy task being a truth teller.

So I will wait and in time maybe I will write more, but I know that I will not pass that house again because they will feel me, and then I will hear their memories…

That’s the thing about memories they are everywhere and can really be heard, the more attention that a memory has been given the more power it has in the present.

I’m too tired to write anymore and like I said sunrise is many hours away and this is a tale I shall write from the light of the Convent.